RT Dissertation/Thesis DB /z-wcorg/ DS http://worldcat.org ID 828677818 LA English T1 Finding my voice : [re] living, [re] learning, and [re] searching becoming a singer in a culture of marginalization A1 Manovski, Miroslav Pavle,, YR 2012 AB Boys who sing in school are often marginalized, taunted, sometimes called "gay." What if singer is someone's whole identity, and that person also happens to be gay? This autoethnography (Ellis, 2004) is a story of education and development of such a singer and how, within this context, a voice teacher with an empowering constructivist approach dramatically altered his path. The nature of the learning experiences in this voice studio combined with the process of engaging in autoethnographic study fostered the healing of deep wounds enabling the [re] searcher to come into his own in a way that made positive differences for him, his family, and possibly, hopefully, others. As his voice-the multiplicities of his voice-helped him become the who he wanted to be through sonic, written, and artful [re] presentations (Barone & Eisner, 2012), the [re] searcher shares the ways he was drawn to use artful/musical thinking and process to inform his reflective/interpretive analysis in this qualitative study. Data for this study consisted of life studies [re] collected by the [re] searcher and [art]i-facts of his life, including audio-recordings of his singing throughout his life. Listening to these recordings, he began to write the stories of how he became a musician and singer. He analyzed these initial stories for emergent themes, examined them in light of extant literature on music learning and teaching, vocal pedagogy practice, and gender issues, and then chose particular stories that exemplified the themes as the basis for crafting the dissertation document. Within the analysis process, improvising-music-as-inquiry (thinking through his fingers and voice) enabled the [re] searcher's understanding of emergent themes, their interplay, and importance. This reflective process, along with support from peers and mentors who shared his work along the way, enabled the [re] searcher's self-efficacy and agency, opening his self, his throat, teaching him to trust the air when he sings, speaks, writes, free from pinching or strangling-no longer living the role of victim rooted in prior experience. The body housing the singing voice will have lived all sorts of experiences that can either empower or prohibit the personal and musical agency necessay to be a singer.