| Acknowledgments | | xxv | |
| Introduction | | 1 | (6) |
| CHAPTER ONE An Unexpected Journey | | 7 | (14) |
| | 9 | (6) |
| | 9 | (2) |
| When the Unexpected Happens |
| | 11 | (4) |
| | 15 | (2) |
| | 15 | (2) |
| | 15 | (1) |
| DEVELOPING YOUR PARENTAL IDENTITY |
| | 16 | (1) |
| MANAGING YOUR RELATIONSHIPS |
| | 16 | (1) |
| | 17 | (4) |
| | 17 | (2) |
| The Tapestry That Reflects Your Emotional Journey |
| | 19 | (2) |
| CHAPTER TWO Grief and Adjustment | | 21 | (40) |
| Wrestling with Opposing Emotions |
| | 22 | (6) |
| | 28 | (17) |
| The Trauma of Premature Birth |
| | 30 | (1) |
| | 30 | (3) |
| | 33 | (4) |
| | 37 | (8) |
| | 37 | (2) |
| | 39 | (1) |
| | 39 | (1) |
| | 40 | (1) |
| | 41 | (1) |
| | 42 | (1) |
| | 43 | (1) |
| | 43 | (1) |
| | 44 | (1) |
| | 44 | (1) |
| LONGING FOR WHAT MIGHT HAVE BEEN |
| | 45 | (1) |
| | 45 | (11) |
| | 46 | (1) |
| Have Realistic Expectations for Your Grief |
| | 47 | (1) |
| | 48 | (1) |
| Find Ways to Feel Close to Your Baby |
| | 49 | (1) |
| | 49 | (2) |
| Accept the Support of Others, However Clumsy It May Seem |
| | 51 | (1) |
| Accept That You and Your Partner Will Grieve Differently |
| | 51 | (1) |
| Seek Professional Counseling |
| | 52 | (1) |
| Choose to Face Your Situation and to Not Let It Destroy Your Life |
| | 52 | (3) |
| Allow Yourself to Hold On to Some Hope for the Future |
| | 55 | (1) |
| Look for the Treasure in Adversity |
| | 55 | (1) |
| Multiple Birth and Multiple Realities |
| | 56 | (2) |
| | 58 | (1) |
| | 59 | (2) |
| CHAPTER THREE Moving through Painful Emotions | | 61 | (34) |
| Moving through Feelings of Failure, Incompetence, and Powerlessness |
| | 62 | (3) |
| Moving through Feelings of Anger |
| | 65 | (4) |
| Venting Anger Constructively |
| | 67 | (1) |
| Recognizing Your Anger's Triggers |
| | 68 | (1) |
| | 69 | (7) |
| Tips for Letting Go of Guilt |
| | 72 | (4) |
| CONSIDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES |
| | 72 | (1) |
| RECOGNIZE THE LIMITS OF YOUR CONTROL |
| | 72 | (1) |
| REFRAME YOUR FEELINGS OF RESPONSIBILITY |
| | 73 | (2) |
| ACCEPT AND LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES |
| | 75 | (1) |
| | 75 | (1) |
| Moving through vulnerability and Fear |
| | 76 | (5) |
| Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder |
| | 78 | (2) |
| Persistent Numbness and Avoidance of Grief |
| | 80 | (1) |
| Getting to the Bottom of Your Grief |
| | 81 | (12) |
| | 84 | (5) |
| | 89 | (1) |
| Spirituality and Religion |
| | 90 | (3) |
| | 93 | (2) |
| CHAPTER FOUR Especially for Fathers | | 95 | (22) |
| | 97 | (18) |
| Intuitive Grievers, Instrumental Grievers |
| | 99 | (3) |
| Dashers, Delayers, Displayers, and Doers |
| | 102 | (1) |
| | 103 | (4) |
| COMMON STYLES OF FILING GRIEF AWAY |
| | 104 | (1) |
| FATHER AS PROTECTOR AND THE UTILITY AND COST OF FILING GRIEF AWAY |
| | 105 | (2) |
| Getting in Touch with Fear, Powerlessness, and Vulnerability |
| | 107 | (2) |
| | 109 | (3) |
| | 112 | (3) |
| | 115 | (2) |
| CHAPTER FIVE Delivering Too Early | | 117 | (34) |
| | 117 | (9) |
| | 120 | (2) |
| Holding On to Your Sanity |
| | 122 | (2) |
| | 124 | (2) |
| When Delivery Is Inevitable |
| | 126 | (1) |
| | 127 | (9) |
| | 132 | (1) |
| | 133 | (1) |
| | 134 | (1) |
| | 135 | (1) |
| Separation from Your Baby |
| | 136 | (3) |
| Seeing Your Baby for the First Time in the NICU |
| | 139 | (5) |
| Mother's Hospital Discharge |
| | 144 | (4) |
| Tips for Coping with Separation from Your Baby |
| | 147 | (1) |
| A Father's Special Worries |
| | 148 | (2) |
| | 150 | (1) |
| CHAPTER SIX Physical Recovery | | 151 | (38) |
| Phantom Feelings of Pregnancy |
| | 153 | (1) |
| | 154 | (7) |
| | 155 | (1) |
| Risk Factors for a Difficult Postpartum Adjustment |
| | 156 | (1) |
| Types of Postpartum Reaction |
| | 157 | (1) |
| POSTPARTUM MOOD REACTIONS |
| | 157 | (1) |
| POSTPARTUM ANXIETY REACTIONS |
| | 157 | (1) |
| POSTPARTUM THOUGHT REACTIONS |
| | 157 | (1) |
| Postpartum Adjustment: The Bottom Line |
| | 158 | (1) |
| Tips for Coping in the Postpartum Period |
| | 158 | (3) |
| Breast Care for Breast-Feeding Mothers |
| | 161 | (9) |
| Advantages of Breast Milk and Breast-Feeding |
| | 161 | (1) |
| | 162 | (1) |
| Establishing Your Milk Supply |
| | 163 | (2) |
| START PUMPING AS SOON AS YOU CAN |
| | 163 | (1) |
| EXPECT SMALL AMOUNTS, ESPECIALLY AT FIRST |
| | 163 | (1) |
| UNDERSTAND ENGORGEMENT-OR LACK OF IT |
| | 164 | (1) |
| PUMP FREQUENTLY AND COMPLETELY |
| | 164 | (1) |
| LEARN THE PROCEDURES FOR STERILIZING EQUIPMENT AND STORING YOUR MILK |
| | 165 | (1) |
| Overcoming Challenges to Breast-Feeding |
| | 165 | (4) |
| | 165 | (1) |
| USE THE BEST PUMP YOU CAN |
| | 166 | (1) |
| FIND THE ROUTINE AND RITUALS THAT WORK FOR YOU |
| | 166 | (1) |
| SEEK HELP FOR NIPPLE OR BREAST PAIN |
| | 166 | (1) |
| CAUSES OF NIPPLE OR BREAST PAIN |
| | 167 | (1) |
| RECOGNIZE THE EFFECTS OF DIET ON YOUR BREAST MILK |
| | 168 | (1) |
| Enhancing Your Milk Supply |
| | 169 | (7) |
| | 169 | (1) |
| AVOID MILK-TAINTING SUBSTANCES |
| | 169 | (1) |
| EAT WELL, EXERCISE, REST, AND RELAX |
| | 169 | (1) |
| Breast Care When You Aren't Breast-Feeding |
| | 170 | (1) |
| Recovery from Cesarean Delivery |
| | 171 | (1) |
| | 172 | (1) |
| | 173 | (1) |
| | 174 | (1) |
| | 175 | (1) |
| | 176 | (3) |
| | 176 | (2) |
| Tips for Reducing Fatigue |
| | 178 | (1) |
| | 179 | (2) |
| | 181 | (3) |
| Recognize the Pitfalls of Dieting |
| | 182 | (1) |
| Learn New Eating Patterns |
| | 182 | (1) |
| Substitute Exercise for Dieting |
| | 182 | (1) |
| Fit Exercise into Your Everyday Life |
| | 183 | (1) |
| Recognize the Emotional Benefits of Exercise |
| | 183 | (1) |
| | 183 | (1) |
| | 184 | (1) |
| | 184 | (1) |
| | 184 | (1) |
| | 185 | (1) |
| | 185 | (1) |
| Other Relaxing Activities |
| | 185 | (1) |
| | 185 | (2) |
| | 187 | (2) |
| CHAPTER SEVEN Acclimating to the NICU | | 189 | (42) |
| | 191 | (1) |
| | 192 | (8) |
| The Growth of Developmentally Supportive Care |
| | 194 | (1) |
| A Short History of NICU Care |
| | 195 | (3) |
| Coping with the Technology-Centered NICU |
| | 198 | (2) |
| Joining Your Baby's Health Care Team |
| | 200 | (8) |
| Forming Relationships with Medical Staff |
| | 202 | (4) |
| Valuing Your Own Contributions |
| | 206 | (1) |
| Valuing the Staff's Contributions-and Knowing They Value Yours |
| | 207 | (1) |
| | 208 | (15) |
| The Benefits of Being Informed |
| | 209 | (3) |
| | 210 | (1) |
| | 210 | (1) |
| | 210 | (1) |
| | 210 | (1) |
| UNCERTAINTY AND FEAR MANAGEMENT |
| | 211 | (1) |
| | 211 | (1) |
| The Challenges of Being Informed |
| | 212 | (1) |
| | 213 | (2) |
| Communicating with Medical Staff |
| | 215 | (1) |
| Bridging Communication Barriers |
| | 216 | (7) |
| | 216 | (2) |
| | 218 | (1) |
| | 219 | (3) |
| | 222 | (1) |
| | 223 | (6) |
| Serving the Best Interests of Your Child |
| | 224 | (3) |
| Being There for Medical Procedures |
| | 227 | (1) |
| Watching Over Multiple Preemies |
| | 227 | (1) |
| | 228 | (1) |
| | 229 | (2) |
| CHAPTER EIGHT Becoming a Parent in the NICU | | 231 | (42) |
| Wanting to Feel Like a Parent |
| | 233 | (10) |
| Embracing Your Intense Emotions |
| | 238 | (2) |
| Claiming Your Parental Identity |
| | 240 | (3) |
| | 243 | (1) |
| Dealing with Your Own Medical Hurdles |
| | 244 | (2) |
| | 246 | (3) |
| | 248 | (1) |
| Negotiating the Medical Barriers in the NICU |
| | 249 | (4) |
| Tips for Overcoming Barriers |
| | 252 | (1) |
| Feeling Displaced by Your Baby's Health Care Providers |
| | 253 | (4) |
| Building Confidence in Your Ability to Take Care of Your Baby |
| | 257 | (2) |
| Parenting from a Distance |
| | 259 | (5) |
| Making the Most of Your Presence |
| | 261 | (1) |
| Making the Most of Your Absences |
| | 262 | (1) |
| | 263 | (1) |
| Recognizing the Importance of Your Presence |
| | 264 | (5) |
| Spreading Yourself among Multiple Babies |
| | 266 | (1) |
| | 267 | (2) |
| | 269 | (2) |
| | 271 | (2) |
| CHAPTER NINE Developing a Relationship with | |
| | 273 | (1) |
| | 274 | (1) |
| | 274 | (13) |
| How Premature Birth Affects Bonding |
| | 275 | (1) |
| | 275 | (4) |
| Characteristics of Bonding |
| | 279 | (8) |
| | 279 | (2) |
| | 281 | (3) |
| | 284 | (1) |
| | 285 | (2) |
| | 287 | (5) |
| The Benefits of Kangarooing |
| | 289 | (1) |
| The Emotions of Kangarooing |
| | 290 | (1) |
| Arranging to Kangaroo Your Baby |
| | 291 | (1) |
| | 292 | (1) |
| | 293 | (2) |
| | 295 | (16) |
| | 296 | (3) |
| STAYING WITH YOUR DECISION TO FEED FORMULA |
| | 296 | (1) |
| CHANGING YOUR MIND AND DECIDING TO BREAST-FEED |
| | 297 | (1) |
| SWITCHING BACK FROM BREAST MILK TO FORMULA |
| | 298 | (1) |
| Breast-Feeding (and Pumping) |
| | 299 | (11) |
| MEETING THE CHALLENGES OF BREAST-FEEDING IN THE NICU |
| | 301 | (4) |
| | 305 | (1) |
| | 306 | (1) |
| SUPPLEMENTATION AND BOTTLE-FEEDING |
| | 306 | (2) |
| PROVIDING BREAST MILK WITHOUT BREAST-FEEDING |
| | 308 | (1) |
| IF YOU MUST STOP PROVIDING BREAST MILK |
| | 309 | (1) |
| | 310 | (1) |
| Becoming Attuned to Your Baby |
| | 311 | (7) |
| Reading Infant Behavioral States |
| | 312 | (1) |
| Reading Other Physical Cues |
| | 313 | (1) |
| | 314 | (6) |
| | 315 | (1) |
| HONOR YOUR BABY'S ATTEMPTS TO MODERATE STIMULATION |
| | 315 | (1) |
| PROTECT YOUR BABY FROM OVERWHELMING OR UNPLEASANT STIMULI |
| | 315 | (1) |
| PROVIDE THE KINDS OF TOUCH, SOUNDS, AND OTHER STIMULI THAT SOOTHE AND SUSTAIN YOUR BABY'S INTEREST |
| | 316 | (2) |
| | 318 | (1) |
| CHAPTER TEN The Roller-Coaster NICU Experience | | 319 | (40) |
| | 320 | (12) |
| | 323 | (4) |
| Waiting with Unpredictability |
| | 327 | (4) |
| | 331 | (1) |
| Balancing Hopes and Fears |
| | 332 | (7) |
| When Your Health Care Teammates Dash Your Hopes |
| | 336 | (2) |
| When Hope Shines More Brightly |
| | 338 | (1) |
| When Hope Changes Direction |
| | 338 | (1) |
| Multiple Realities-Multiple Roller Coasters |
| | 339 | (2) |
| Making Comparisons in the NICU |
| | 341 | (6) |
| | 343 | (2) |
| When Other Preemies Go Home |
| | 345 | (1) |
| What to Remember about Comparisons |
| | 345 | (2) |
| Making Life-and-Death Decisions in the NICU |
| | 347 | (7) |
| Parental Decision Making in the "Gray Zone" |
| | 347 | (2) |
| Dealing with the Uncertainties |
| | 349 | (2) |
| Wrestling with Guilt and Second Thoughts |
| | 351 | (3) |
| Decisions about Long-Term Care |
| | 354 | (1) |
| | 355 | (2) |
| | 357 | (2) |
| CHAPTER ELEVEN When a Baby Dies | | 359 | (38) |
| | 360 | (12) |
| An Overview of the Grieving Process |
| | 361 | (1) |
| Realistic Expectations for Your Grief |
| | 362 | (3) |
| | 363 | (1) |
| | 364 | (1) |
| Multiple Realities and Grief |
| | 365 | (2) |
| | 367 | (5) |
| ACCEPTING YOUR NEED TO GRIEVE |
| | 367 | (1) |
| IDENTIFYING THE FEELINGS YOU ARE EXPERIENCING |
| | 367 | (2) |
| EMBRACING YOUR NEED TO DWELL ON YOUR BABY |
| | 369 | (1) |
| PURSUING THOSE THINGS THAT HELP YOU COPE |
| | 370 | (1) |
| HAVING FAITH THAT EVENTUALLY YOU WILL FEEL BETTER |
| | 371 | (1) |
| | 372 | (10) |
| | 373 | (4) |
| Bringing a Dying Baby Home |
| | 377 | (1) |
| | 378 | (2) |
| | 380 | (5) |
| | 381 | (1) |
| | 381 | (1) |
| | 382 | (1) |
| | 382 | (3) |
| Making Peace with Difficult Decisions |
| | 385 | (10) |
| | 386 | (1) |
| | 387 | (1) |
| Regrets about Intervening |
| | 388 | (1) |
| Second Thoughts about Refusing Intervention |
| | 388 | (3) |
| Gaining Perspective on the Decision to Let Go |
| | 391 | (4) |
| | 395 | (2) |
| CHAPTER TWELVE Discharge and Homecoming | | 397 | (34) |
| Transferring Back to Your Local Hospital |
| | 400 | (2) |
| The Transition to Discharge: Practicing care |
| | 402 | (6) |
| Gaining Confidence in Your Caregiving Abilities |
| | 404 | (1) |
| Coping with Imminent Discharge |
| | 405 | (3) |
| Discharge with Medical Equipment ... or Without |
| | 408 | (6) |
| | 408 | (2) |
| Medical Devices and Equipment |
| | 410 | (2) |
| Coping with Your Baby's Ongoing Medical Needs |
| | 412 | (2) |
| | 414 | (2) |
| Finding Caregivers You Can Trust |
| | 416 | (3) |
| Attitudes toward Sharing Care |
| | 416 | (2) |
| Making Room for Other Caregivers |
| | 418 | (1) |
| Discharge with Multiple Babies |
| | 419 | (2) |
| | 421 | (2) |
| | 423 | (6) |
| | 423 | (2) |
| Dropping Your Emotional Guard |
| | 425 | (2) |
| Having Patience with Your Grief |
| | 427 | (2) |
| | 429 | (2) |
| CHAPTER THIRTEEN Settling in at Home | | 431 | (26) |
| | 432 | (4) |
| | 432 | (1) |
| Responsibility-and Fears of Inadequacy |
| | 433 | (1) |
| | 434 | (1) |
| Reclamation-and Confidence |
| | 435 | (1) |
| Your Baby's Reorientation |
| | 436 | (1) |
| Reorientation with Multiples |
| | 437 | (2) |
| | 439 | (7) |
| Mixed Feelings about Your Baby |
| | 441 | (1) |
| Your Dynamic Bond with Your Baby |
| | 442 | (1) |
| Your Baby's Attachment to You |
| | 443 | (3) |
| Getting in Tune with Your Growing Baby |
| | 446 | (7) |
| Responding to Your Baby's Cues |
| | 448 | (1) |
| | 449 | (1) |
| Encouraging Attachment in the Face of Discomfort |
| | 450 | (3) |
| Juggling the Needs of Multiples |
| | 453 | (2) |
| | 455 | (2) |
| CHAPTER FOURTEEN Meeting Caregiving Challenges at Home | | 457 | (34) |
| Coping with Feelings of Vulnerability |
| | 457 | (9) |
| Vulnerability and Preemie Parenthood |
| | 457 | (5) |
| | 459 | (1) |
| SEPARATING REAL FROM IMAGINED THREATS |
| | 459 | (3) |
| The Medically Fragile Baby |
| | 462 | (4) |
| ISOLATION AS A PROTECTIVE STRATEGY-AND ITS EFFECTS |
| | 462 | (2) |
| TIPS FOR COPING WITH ISOLATION |
| | 464 | (2) |
| | 466 | (8) |
| | 466 | (3) |
| | 469 | (3) |
| | 472 | (2) |
| Managing the Needs of a Medically Fragile or Technology-Dependent Baby |
| | 474 | (11) |
| Coping with Chronic Respiratory Complications |
| | 475 | (2) |
| Coping with Feeding Complications |
| | 477 | (8) |
| COMING HOME FROM THE NICU WITH A FEEDING TUBE |
| | 477 | (2) |
| MAKING THE GASTROSTOMY TUBE DECISION |
| | 479 | (5) |
| ADDRESSING OTHER FEEDING ISSUES |
| | 484 | (1) |
| | 485 | (4) |
| Coping with Rehopitalization |
| | 487 | (2) |
| | 489 | (2) |
| CHAPTER FIFTEEN Becoming the Kind of Parent You Want to Be | | 491 | (30) |
| Following Your Nurturing Instincts |
| | 493 | (6) |
| Revisiting Parenting Approaches |
| | 493 | (2) |
| Traditional Mothering for Modern Times |
| | 495 | (3) |
| Tips for Nurturing Parenting |
| | 498 | (1) |
| | 499 | (6) |
| Guidelines for Protective Parenting |
| | 501 | (2) |
| Protectiveness and Your Child's Vulnerability |
| | 503 | (2) |
| Your Personal Growth as a Parent |
| | 505 | (8) |
| Adapting to the Long-Term Process of Parenting a Preemie |
| | 505 | (2) |
| | 507 | (1) |
| Getting the Support You Need |
| | 508 | (1) |
| Dealing with Parenting Anger |
| | 509 | (4) |
| | 510 | (3) |
| Perspectives on Parenting Your Preemie |
| | 513 | (7) |
| Questioning What's "Normal" |
| | 513 | (1) |
| Thinking about the Future |
| | 514 | (1) |
| | 515 | (3) |
| | 518 | (1) |
| Choosing Your Perspective |
| | 519 | (1) |
| | 520 | (1) |
| CHAPTER SIXTEEN Supporting Your Child's Development | | 521 | (50) |
| Six Basic Skills for Supporting Your Preemie's Development |
| | 522 | (30) |
| The Brain-Behavior Connection |
| | 524 | (3) |
| Tuning In to Sensitivities and Thresholds |
| | 527 | (3) |
| EXPANDING YOUR BABY'S SENSORY ABILITIES |
| | 528 | (2) |
| CAPTURING AND HOLDING YOUR BABY'S INTEREST |
| | 530 | (1) |
| Empathizing with Your Child |
| | 530 | (3) |
| TEACHING YOUR CHILD ABOUT EMOTIONS |
| | 530 | (1) |
| NURTURING YOUR CHILD'S NATURE |
| | 531 | (2) |
| Following Your Child's Lead |
| | 533 | (13) |
| | 534 | (3) |
| GROWTH CHARTS, DEVELOPMENTAL TIMETABLES, AND TRUSTING YOUR CHILD'S PATH |
| | 537 | (3) |
| GRAPPLING WITH ORAL FEEDING DIFFICULTIES |
| | 540 | (6) |
| Encouraging Your Child to Stretch beyond Current Abilities |
| | 546 | (4) |
| | 549 | (1) |
| | 549 | (1) |
| | 550 | (2) |
| | 552 | (16) |
| Evaluating Professional Evaluations |
| | 553 | (10) |
| | 553 | (2) |
| THE MISLEADING EVALUATION |
| | 555 | (4) |
| ADJUSTING YOUR OWN EVALUATION |
| | 559 | (2) |
| FINDING SPECIALISTS YOU CAN COLLABORATE WITH |
| | 561 | (2) |
| | 563 | (2) |
| | 565 | (3) |
| | 568 | (3) |
| CHAPTER SEVENTEEN Watching Your Child Grow | | 571 | (26) |
| | 573 | (15) |
| Watching Development Closely |
| | 576 | (3) |
| Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop |
| | 579 | (4) |
| Vulnerable Child Syndrome |
| | 583 | (2) |
| Managing Heightened Vigilance |
| | 585 | (3) |
| Living with Uncertainty and Ambiguity |
| | 588 | (8) |
| | 591 | (2) |
| Coping with Uncertainties |
| | 593 | (3) |
| | 596 | (1) |
| CHAPTER EIGHTEEN Discovering Disabilities | | 597 | (38) |
| | 599 | (3) |
| Facing Reality, Facing Feelings |
| | 602 | (2) |
| Grieving This New Realization |
| | 604 | (2) |
| Coping with Your Feelings |
| | 606 | (14) |
| | 606 | (3) |
| | 609 | (2) |
| | 611 | (1) |
| | 612 | (1) |
| | 613 | (6) |
| | 619 | (1) |
| | 620 | (5) |
| | 625 | (9) |
| Intervention and Advocacy |
| | 625 | (3) |
| | 628 | (6) |
| | 634 | (1) |
| CHAPTER NINETEEN Your Family | | 635 | (40) |
| | 635 | (22) |
| Opening the Door for Feelings |
| | 637 | (2) |
| | 639 | (1) |
| | 640 | (6) |
| | 646 | (4) |
| Relying on Your Commitment |
| | 650 | (1) |
| Negotiating Sex and Intimacy |
| | 650 | (2) |
| Getting the Outside Support You Need |
| | 652 | (1) |
| Can Our Relationship Survive? |
| | 653 | (6) |
| WEATHERING CHANGE AND CRISIS |
| | 653 | (2) |
| THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING IN LIKE" |
| | 655 | (1) |
| | 656 | (1) |
| | 657 | (2) |
| | 659 | (15) |
| Sharing Your Time and Attention |
| | 659 | (5) |
| | 664 | (3) |
| | 667 | (2) |
| Preparing Siblings for Your Preemie's Homecoming |
| | 669 | (1) |
| | 670 | (4) |
| | 674 | (1) |
| CHAPTER TWENTY Your Support Network and the Outside World | | 675 | (54) |
| The Importance of Support Networks |
| | 677 | (9) |
| Connecting with Other Parents of Preemies |
| | 680 | (2) |
| | 682 | (1) |
| Social Support for Fathers |
| | 683 | (3) |
| Relationships with Your Extended Family |
| | 686 | (13) |
| | 688 | (1) |
| | 688 | (4) |
| | 692 | (7) |
| | 693 | (2) |
| | 695 | (4) |
| | 699 | (15) |
| Sharing Information with Others |
| | 699 | (5) |
| Finding Your Place in the Parent Network |
| | 704 | (2) |
| | 706 | (1) |
| Dealing with Others' Comments |
| | 707 | (4) |
| Dealing with Other Women's Pregnancies |
| | 711 | (3) |
| | 714 | (13) |
| Negotiating with Your Employer |
| | 714 | (2) |
| | 716 | (9) |
| | 716 | (2) |
| | 718 | (2) |
| ADJUSTING TO STAYING HOME |
| | 720 | (2) |
| FINE-TUNING THE BALANCE BETWEEN PARENTING AND CAREER |
| | 722 | (3) |
| | 725 | (4) |
| | 726 | (1) |
| | 727 | (2) |
| CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE Considering Another Pregnancy | | 729 | (22) |
| | 729 | (7) |
| Exploration and Discussion |
| | 733 | (2) |
| Making Decisions with Your Partner |
| | 735 | (1) |
| Deciding against Another Pregnancy |
| | 736 | (3) |
| Reconsidering Your "Ideal" Family Size |
| | 738 | (1) |
| | 739 | (3) |
| | 739 | (3) |
| Coping with Others' Reactions |
| | 742 | (1) |
| | 742 | (7) |
| Working with Your Health Care Providers |
| | 742 | (4) |
| Prenatal Diagnostic Testing |
| | 746 | (1) |
| | 747 | (2) |
| | 749 | (2) |
| CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO Coping during a Post-Preemie Pregnancy | | 751 | (38) |
| | 752 | (9) |
| | 754 | (4) |
| Facing and Managing Other Painful Feelings |
| | 758 | (1) |
| Getting Past Significant Milestones |
| | 759 | (2) |
| Coping with a High-Risk Pregnancy and Bed Rest |
| | 761 | (16) |
| Managing the Uncertainties |
| | 762 | (1) |
| Overcoming Feelings of Failure |
| | 763 | (1) |
| Subduing Helplessness during Bed Rest |
| | 764 | (1) |
| Maintaining Your Primary Relationship |
| | 765 | (2) |
| Parenting during a High-Risk Pregnancy |
| | 767 | (4) |
| CHILD CARE AND STAYING CONNECTED |
| | 767 | (1) |
| | 768 | (1) |
| BALANCING CONFLICTING NEEDS |
| | 769 | (1) |
| CHILDREN'S EMOTIONAL NEEDS |
| | 770 | (1) |
| Tending to Your Emotional Needs during Bed Rest |
| | 771 | (6) |
| GRACEFULLY GIVING UP CONTROL |
| | 771 | (1) |
| | 772 | (2) |
| | 774 | (1) |
| | 775 | (2) |
| | 777 | (5) |
| When Joy Mixes with Sadness |
| | 778 | (1) |
| Revisiting What Might Have Been |
| | 779 | (1) |
| Complications with a Full-Term Birth |
| | 780 | (1) |
| | 780 | (2) |
| | 782 | (4) |
| Coping the Second (or More) Time Around |
| | 783 | (1) |
| | 784 | (2) |
| | 786 | (3) |
| CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE Healing and Moving On | | 789 | (28) |
| | 791 | (10) |
| Moving On but Not Forgetting |
| | 795 | (2) |
| Letting Go of What Might Have Been |
| | 797 | (1) |
| Moving On in the Face of Uncertainties |
| | 798 | (2) |
| Talking to Your Growing Child about the NICU |
| | 800 | (1) |
| Finding Meaning in Your Journey |
| | 801 | (13) |
| Finding Treasure in Adversity |
| | 802 | (2) |
| Weaving Treasures into Your Tapestry |
| | 804 | (2) |
| Vulnerability, Appreciation, and Hope |
| | 806 | (2) |
| | 808 | (2) |
| Personal Growth and Adaptation |
| | 810 | (4) |
| Seeing Your Transformation as Healing |
| | 814 | (3) |
| Appendices | | 817 | (66) |
| | 817 | (18) |
| B: A Note to Friends and Relatives |
| | 835 | (8) |
| | 843 | (36) |
| D: Neonatal Guidelines for Parents and Health Care Professionals from the Colorado Collective for Medical Decisions |
| | 879 | (4) |
| Index | | 883 | |
